What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You

In this marvelous age of the social media new words have become popular but some of these words had prior meaning. So there is a potential for confusion.

In the world of Facebook the word “Friend” has a meaning a bit closer to our offline worlds. Ostensibly we “know” the people we friend on Facebook, at least we have been introduced by someone we know and we have to approve the connection. On Twitter if you set your profile to “Public” anyone can “follow” you, which only means that they can see your posts, your tweets. I think this is what I love most about Twitter. So far it is my favorite social media tool.

A Tree Falls in the Forest

On Twitter if someone follows you and you follow them back this too is called “friends”. But are they “real” friends for this reason? No that is absurd. It is about getting to know someone. But like in the offline world of face to face it takes time to get to know people. In the offline world you don’t get smacked with an “unfollow” from someone who you have had lots of contact with but who has evidently had “enough” of you. Imagine if you got such a face to face snub! Online we have tools and we can check. I find this fascinating.

I get a daily report of new followers and who has unfollowed me the previous 24 hours. After three months I finally had someone who I had daily contact with, met in person, unfollow me. So what do I do?

Well first of all it helped to be rational and ask myself is this person really a friend? Sure we’ve had contact, lots of engagement just like we wanted from social media, but so what? I had the fortune to read a delightful article by a witty writer just as I was getting started with full-time Twitter efforts. It was all about the drama of tweeting and retweeting, constant @replies and then they are off with other “friends” and then the friend who unfollows you. Yes the drama.

Twitter is a great social melting pot; a laboratory of human nature. But with one huge difference. People are really on good behavior on Twitter. It is the kindest, most positive place I have ever experienced strangers. Someone said this was because everyone is trying to sell something, so they do all the nicey-nice stuff. Well that is just…nice!

So what to do when a “friend” unfollows. It doesn’t matter, just decide rationally. Sometimes I will unfollow since I need to disconnect from the drama; out of sight out of mind. But if the person offers value to me in their tweets, I will always checkout their profile regularly and follow their stream of consciousness. I don’t care if they follow me back, because I am learning how to FOLLOW. I follow a lot of people who don’t follow me back, because I am trying to learn from them. So it really doesn’t matter if they follow me and if I want to really reach them I just call out their @name. People always respond to their names even if they don’t reply back.

62 Comments to “What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You”

  1. FollowMeTools

    Please RT: Lady Greetums Secret Society » What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows: Lady Greetums Secret Society -… http://bit.ly/4zrcNa

  2. Kat Caverly

    What to do when a "friend" unfollows you > http://ow.ly/H6GI

  3. Kat Caverly

    What to do when a "friend" unfollows you > http://ow.ly/H6Hy

  4. Steve Woods

    Are you preparing us? RT @Greetums: What to do when a "friend" unfollows you > http://ow.ly/H6Hy

  5. Kat Caverly

    What to do when a "friend" unfollows you > http://ow.ly/H6It

  6. randall beggs

    RT @Greetums: What to do when a "Friend" Unfollows You (an essay) http://greetu.ms/9kTIvt <– well said, & I agree

  7. Rob Pluta

    Fascinating take on unfollowers -> RT @Greetums: What to Do When a "Friend" Unfollows You http://bit.ly/boJdn8

  8. Mariam Kobras

    RT @Greetums: What to do when a "Friend" Unfollows You (an essay) http://greetu.ms/9kTIvt < shrug your shoulder and move on!

  9. Valerie

    RT @MariamMKobras: RT @Greetums: What to do when a "Friend" Unfollows You (an essay) http://greetu.ms/9kTIvt < shrug your shoulder an …

  10. Daniel Barta

    RT @Greetums: What to do when a "Friend" Unfollows You (an essay)
    http://greetu.ms/9kTIvt

  11. Pamela Andrews

    RT @MariamMKobras: RT @Greetums: What to do when a "Friend" Unfollows You (an essay) http://greetu.ms/9kTIvt < shrug your shoulder an …

  12. Melita Ellis

    RT @Greetums: What to do when a "Friend" Unfollows You (an essay)
    http://greetu.ms/9kTIvt

  13. Rob Pluta

    When a true friend unfollows on Twitter RT @Greetums: http://bit.ly/gDevQg #gratitude

  14. Melissa Stewart 16 June 2011 at 3:35 am #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://greetu.ms/9kTIvt (a good reminder) via @Greetums

  15. TweetSmarter 16 June 2011 at 4:10 am #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  16. Kshitij Banker 16 June 2011 at 4:12 am #

    Interesting! RT @TweetSmarter What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://t.co/stzuSGi

  17. Miguel Colin 16 June 2011 at 4:12 am #

    RT @TweetSmarter: What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku // it happens!

  18. Trish 16 June 2011 at 4:12 am #

    Wow did someone actually write this RT @TweetSmarter: What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  19. Gladys 16 June 2011 at 4:12 am #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  20. Joseph Reid 16 June 2011 at 4:14 am #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  21. clarise 16 June 2011 at 4:23 am #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  22. jumei setyo 16 June 2011 at 4:27 am #

    kalo ada orang yang unfollow bukan berarti kiamat kan? What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/gDevQg

  23. Aimee 16 June 2011 at 4:27 am #

    RT @Greetums: What to Do When a "Friend" Unfollows You http://t.co/E2UEQmW

  24. judskie ramirez 16 June 2011 at 4:29 am #

    RT @TweetSmarter: What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  25. foram divrania 16 June 2011 at 4:57 am #

    @MrShri hahaha RT @TweetSmarter What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://t.co/ETpQPTh

  26. Kat 16 June 2011 at 5:05 am #

    RT @Greetums: What to Do When a "Friend" Unfollows You http://t.co/Q90Wi1O

  27. iPete 16 June 2011 at 5:29 am #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  28. alex al-kanani 16 June 2011 at 6:28 am #

    Being unfollowed? Why not to care about it: http://t.co/Ceb7TXR via @Greetums #twitter

  29. Mary Sarah 16 June 2011 at 11:28 am #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://j.mp/9kTIvt (a good reminder) RT @Greetums

  30. Mark Nelson 16 June 2011 at 11:35 am #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://j.mp/9kTIvt (a good reminder) RT @Greetums

  31. TweetSmarter 16 June 2011 at 12:01 pm #

    r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  32. fortunatus alfi 16 June 2011 at 12:03 pm #

    RT @TweetSmarter: r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  33. Joe 16 June 2011 at 12:05 pm #

    r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  34. Cris Nacionales 16 June 2011 at 12:07 pm #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/8vd3Lb | Yes, there R ppl who R so valuable that I don't care if they follow me back.

  35. Bettie 16 June 2011 at 12:07 pm #

    r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  36. Scott 16 June 2011 at 12:07 pm #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/8vd3Lb | Yes, there R ppl who R so valuable that I don't care if they follow me back.

  37. Sivu ngcaba 16 June 2011 at 12:07 pm #

    LOL!! RT @sboshmafu: cc sivu RT @TweetSmarter: r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  38. Rexcrisanto Delson 16 June 2011 at 12:10 pm #

    RT @TweetSmarter: r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  39. Bethany Sockel 16 June 2011 at 12:18 pm #

    What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://t.co/rPahliK @startmywebpage

  40. Ahmed Fouad Sadek 16 June 2011 at 12:25 pm #

    http://t.co/1NKhIEw What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You #Twitter :P

  41. miss waiching liu 16 June 2011 at 12:29 pm #

    r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  42. Elly van Amstel 16 June 2011 at 12:29 pm #

    r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  43. Trina H. 16 June 2011 at 12:33 pm #

    RT @TweetSmarter: r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  44. Neal Linkon 16 June 2011 at 12:36 pm #

    r/t What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  45. Teuku Fahri 16 June 2011 at 12:46 pm #

    NICE! Buat yg galau minta di-follow & yg takut di-unfollow. RT @TweetSmarter: What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  46. Bubba 16 June 2011 at 1:14 pm #

    http://t.co/VZHs0Jn via @Greetums

  47. jodi sh. doff 16 June 2011 at 1:45 pm #

    Grow a pair, and move the f–k on. RT @umanoid: What to Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You http://bit.ly/izLhHc

  48. TweetSmarter 16 June 2011 at 8:00 pm #

    What Do You Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You? http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  49. Mr. Bitterness 16 June 2011 at 8:01 pm #

    kick them in the ass on the way out & move on. RT @TweetSmarter: What Do You Do When a “Friend” Unfollows You? http://bit.ly/mtXsku

  50. Reinout Holland 16 June 2011 at 8:01 pm #

    RT @Greetums: What to Do When a "Friend" Unfollows You http://t.co/Y5pJHJW

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